So while I really enjoy a good Saturday morning list, I’m tired. And I’ve been meaning to write about this all week and kept forgetting (thanks, pregnancy brain). Since the title is “Potty Training”, let me tell you what this is NOT:
1. a how-to
2. an examination of one method versus another
3. a success story
4. anything else clever or cute that you will think back one day and say “Hey, that one blog I read? She had some good stuff on this…”
5. (I felt like I needed a #5)…
What this IS:
1. my brain processing and thinking out loud
2. a way to see that we’re actually making progress
3. a place where I can openly wonder if my teaching degree and studies in childhood development are actually useful to me still and how much I remember
[See look, I still made lists!]
I won’t lie – when my mom reminded me that I potty trained myself before Seester was born (and by the by, we are the same age apart as Lemonade and Dozer will be), I thought I would hold out till she just did it herself. She’s pretty much me, but 24.5 years younger, but no dice.
We got the potty chair out probably a little late (who would have thought to have it sitting there for no reason for a year? O, lots of people? Good…) and started having her sit on it.
Now mind you, Lemonade is almost 18 months old. There are people who think I’m CRAZY for starting this and people who think I’m weird because I don’t have it done. I catch a lot more flack from the former group than the latter, but hey, she’s my kid. She’s smart enough to talk about it, so she’s smart enough to learn something new about it. That’s my theory. So haters go and hate someplace else.
And while I promised not to commentate on the different types or methodologies of potty training, I must say I’m much more drawn to elimination communication principles than bribing my child with candy or waiting till they are 3. Again, that’s just me. But I worked full time till Lemonade was 10 months old and didn’t want to drag her into the bathroom because, well, if she’s still in that sitting or laying phase, I think it’s kind of gross, but we’ll see what I do differently with Dozer. Live and learn, right? So I think a lot of factors contribute to potty training success in general.
Like some people NEVER let their kid see them pee. Which is your business I guess, but how are they supposed to know it’s normal if they don’t see it? And I mean, how do you escape them? There are almost always 2 adults at my house at any given time, and I get to pee by myself like maybe twice a day (which isn’t saying much considering I pee all the time). Going to the bathroom is just like anything else – it’s a learned behavior.
And kids CAN learn WAY earlier than we bother to teach them here in the States (I can’t speak to all first world countries, but I would guess this is a growing trend everywhere, and not just here.) When Hubs and I were in South Africa for our honeymoon, there was a girl…maybe Lemonade’s age…(it’s so hard to tell when they are 1. naturally shorter and 2. possibly malnourished) anyways, she would go over to the bushes and do her business and come back because that’s what other people did. It’s not like the pioneers or native people groups were getting peed on (since, ya know, there were no water proof linings) for 3 years! No way. Kids learn what they are taught.
Anyways, I also don’t see forcing it at this age. NeeNee (mi madre) is all about getting this done. That’s my mom’s personality. I’m a little more laid back. Plus she is only 18 months old and we just started. I don’t see any need for her to be crying, sitting on the potty, thinking I’m torturing her. No, I do not want 2 kids in diapers. Yes, it would be great if she was potty trained by May/June. But that’s not now, so we have time. Plus we JUST started even introducing the potty in like December? so huge progress here people, HUGE.
I ask her if she wants to go. If she says no, I don’t push it. If she says yes, we go. I encourage her a LOT to go if her diaper is dry. She maybe sits on the potty 2 or 3 times a day (yesterday she was clingy and it was none, fine). We usually go “pee pee” once a day. We look at it, we rejoice, and we get a treat. Day 1 it was ice cream, because, that’s a big day. I let her eat peanut butter out of the jar, some chocolate chips, or run around naked. All things she LOVES. And we talk about it. ALL THE TIME. But I don’t feel the need to push her or make it traumatic. Maybe I’m wrong. I just don’t feel like we’re “there” yet.
Long story short – I have found success by just letting her do what comes naturally. I would love to be done in the next couple months, so at some point, we’re going to have to crack down a little more. Fine. That doesn’t mean today, but maybe it does.
I’m also like really trying to work through like how we go anywhere when she’s still in the in between phase because…public restrooms…accidents…I just can’t wrap my mind around it. More live and learn I guess. I have a feeling I’ll be washing my hands a LOT!
Where do you think that gene anomaly went that I just trained myself? And how do I get that into each of my kids?